Thursday, July 14, 2011

The WTF List: Sucker Punch

I'm a sucker for movies where the critics just tear up the film. So realizing that Sucker Punch which got a 22% rotten rating on Rotten Tomatoes and also the fact I decided to have some fun with the production stills I HAD to watch this for myself.

And I'll admit after watching the whole damn thing, I don't really know exactly what the purpose of Baby Doll (Emily Browning) mission was to "escape" is exactly. But whatever. I'll admit, seeing hot actresses wearing skimpy clothing kicking ass with a full orgy of CGI at Zach Snyder's disposal is not too bad as one might imagine.

So on to the WTF List.

1.) As this being my first Emily Browning flick, she is damn hot.
2.) It's PG-13 but basically they're at a speakeasy where the customers fuck the dancers. Yup totally PG-13 in my book.
3.) Steampunkers are weeping as they watch this
4.) I've never seen samurai statues get smashed by a hot blonde girl in a sailor moon outfit (how can one not like that?)
5.) It's American live action anime in a nutshell.
6.) Let me just say this. I'm a big Jena Malone fan.
7.) I'm also a big Jamie Chung fan. I have no idea who Abbie Cornish is. And I have indeed seen Vanessa Hudgens naked.
8.) Nazi zombies vs an A-team of hot girls. Seriously...how can one not enjoy watching this?
9.) So the "dances" are actually the action scenes. Clearly OLD ME understands this film concept but TWEEN ME can't get enough of seeing Emily Browning do backflips and Jena Malone shooting a gun that weighs more than her
10.) I forgot to mention this is the hottest mental institution...well evaaaaaar. I'd like to get declared insane and sent to this place.
11.) Dragons make everything better.
12.) The fact that all these actresses are like super hot makes every scene tolerable to watch.
13.) The CGI is all style and pretty much what you get. It's CGI eye candy that gives you a headache but whatever.
14.) A robot can't be cut by a sword. Just saying.
15.) If the Japanese made this type of film (and they have in some form or another) we'd call it "super cool" and "awesome". Hollywood makes it and we think it's Hollywood blowing its wad full of CGI and scantily clad hot girls. I see no difference here.
16.) Men are so evil. We should all be ashamed of ourselves.
17.) You know this is just the female version of 300 right?
18.) Wait..Emily Browning and Abbie Cornish are Australian??!? Really?
19.) That escape was easy as pie. They probably got tips from Michael Scofield.
20.) Wow that ending is kinda depressing.

Declare this movie fit for tween boys everywhere. Sure it's devoid of any plot, it's all eye candy (CGI and hawtness) and is full of steampunky action scenes but I dug it.

I'm not crazy right?

3 comments:

  1. No, you're not crazy at all. I dug it too... pretty much, if I have to be honest. The robo-samurai seqence just blew me away :)

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  2. It's more like the female version of fear and loathing in las vegas.

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  3. after i watched this movie i was like WTF DID I JUST WATCH ??? no story shit at all. we never even got to see any much violence. no stripper scenes(i mean COME ON!!!) the girls were effing hot (thats good!). BUT the story was SO SHIT LOL WTF!? LOL. and the end was the most stupid shit ive ever seen. (comeon WTF) and after i watched that shit. i was like. 2 hours I WILL NEVER GET BACK. And i seen Vanessa naked too. is nice lol. but seriously wtf, was the director High? those hot girls. al that animation, and THAT is what you come up with ! ARE U HIGH ?

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